Is Heaven for Real? Here's what I think, and here's what I know.....

What I think and what I know are two completely different things.  What I think is, Heaven is for real.  That was a movie, remember?  "Heaven is for real."  Why do you think that movie drew so many people's attention?  Because it was what we think?  Or because it was what we know?  We don't know.  We watch it so we'll think we know.

The other day, three days ago to be exact, I started thinking about my dad who passed away 15 months ago.  I started thinking about, how distant he felt.  How far away.  I've tried meditation to communicate with him, so far nothing.  He was so good at keeping connected with those who'd passed. I always believed he had a gift because he would tell me very interesting things that I had never heard before.  Things I found interesting that I couldn't figure out where he would have come up with those ideas or thoughts.  I weighed out the decision to believe or not believe what he was telling me and I decided, who was I to judge what he was saying?  After all, he was my dad.  In my mind, he was all knowing.  He was so smart.  Even today, with all the amazing people I have met in my life, I hold him with such high regard.  He and my husband both.

So three days ago, I made the decision that he and I were truly fading from each others lives.  Our distance, from his death, was separating us farther and farther apart.  I have read so much literature about death, grief, sadness, loneliness and loss that I decided to put something I'd read to good use.  I decided to ask my dad to come to me in a dream.  According to what I'd read, you ask and you should receive, so I asked.  The next day, after waking, I wondered about my dreams.  Had my dad come to me in my dreams?  After moments of deep thought I realized, he actually had.  I couldn't believe it and due to the fact that I question most things, I debated about it.  I debated whether or not I should believe it and smile about it or discard it and believe it was nothing.  I retraced the dream in my mind, in its entirety and realized my dream was very specific.  It seemed to obvious not to believe.  So, here is the dream...

 I was standing in a long hallway.  It seemed like a hospital hallway or maybe a dormitory hallway.  It was a nice hallway.  Friendly.  I saw my dad from a distance and we walked up to each other.  We hugged.  It was one of those hugs you actually felt. It was as though, it weren't a dream at all. It was so real, it felt as if I'd opened my eyes, he and I would have been standing there hugging.  I could actually feel his warmth.  When I stepped back from him to look at his face, a man I didn't know, stood further down the hall.  He was at a distance and he was watching us.  My dad said to him, "I can actually feel her hug.  It isn't like, she's reaching through me like a ghost, I can feel her hug."  The man took a step toward us and I put my hand out with my index finger held up, as if to say, "Wait."  I said, "No.  Stop!  I don't want you to change anything.  I want to be able to feel his hugs.  Don't change a thing."  The man stopped walking and stood there.  I showed my dad something of his I was holding in my hand and I said, "Look at all the dust on this.  This is how long you have been gone.  Do you see how much dust has accumulated on this?" He took it and held it in his hand and looked at the dust.  Then I said, "Dad, I just have to ask you this one question, and whatever you say, I will believe.  I won't question it ever again.  Do you like heaven?"  He said, "I love it.  There are so many people here I love."  I said, "Okay dad, I won't ever question it again."

That's all I remember.  That was the dream.  I cry just thinking about it.  I have to believe it was real.  I have to believe it was him.  I asked him to come to me in a dream that night and he did.  If it were just any old dream I may have questioned its validity and let it go as though it meant nothing, but to ask him to come to me in a dream and to have us specifically talk about where he is..... well, that just seems to obvious to ignore.

You know, I never did see that movie, "Heaven is for real"  I don't know that I ever will, but I do know one thing, something felt very real about that dream.

Missing you dad.
S.